crEATive

Hey, what's up, hello! The last post of 2016, the year is really done isn't it? Well I thought I'd be kind enough and say a huge huge huge THANKYOU to all of you guys for coming through big time in 2016. From my OG readers (the old ones from the first post to now) to you new readers (I see you) my thankyou and kind regards are in order. What I have learnt from 2K16 is quite a lot. First, that it was a leap year- the 366 days thing. What's really interesting is how we come to 366 days. So, let me break it down for you, we have that 365 and 1/4 (a quarter) days trip Earth makes around The Sun. At this point,I'd like to introduce their nicknames; Hottie (sun) and Earthy (earth). I know I know, my nicknaming skills are a bit rough ,okay, not a bit, REALLY rough, but at least we have something to work with. So, Earthy revolves around Hottie for 365 and 1/4 days. All this while, Earthy is rotating on its own axis and making all sort of random weather patterns. Oh o

  Ho ho ho!!!! So,I am sure some of you have your minds in the gutter after that very spirited christmasy salutation, too much English, I know bear with me. I think this little thing you and I have going on has gotten to that 'been married for 34 years' phase, you know? I feel like we need a little something to get our groove back on, get that freak back on (preferably on the streets, if you catch my very disturbing drift *eye wink*). So, since I am that 'on top of things' guy I have just the thing; a literary threesome. Oh come on, stop acting shocked at my choice of words at least it has literary in there. Anyway, I hit up a friend of mine Hilda who agreed to be the one helping you and I get through this rough patch. Read through: Christmas is celebrated all across the world and brings a better share of joy to all the people. Since I was a little girl I kept all my Christmas memories intact and stored, ready to take them down memory lane. We come from African c

Hi there! November is finally upon us guys, you know what that means, pretty soon we will be drunk-screaming 'Happy Birthday Jesus' at the top of our lungs, wearing new clothes 'nguo za christmas' (I promise, this is usually my favourite part of the whole 'shabadabing' SHAMELESSLY). Let us not forget the activity we all religiously involve ourselves in, making new year resolutions and yes, this does include those self-righteous columnists who write how they are so debonair and cannot involve themselves in such foolery. Oh bother, do us all a favour and admit you are as self-consoling as the rest of us are, we all 'resolve' that in the coming year, we will; a. Join a gym, Go unfailingly, lose those extra kilos and get that crazy body by the next Christmas b. Be more careful with our resources and only spend money on what we really need and I mean 'REALLY' need c. A whole list of other things we think we can achieve by a simple flick of the

So, how are things on this of the internet? I know, I know, it's been a minute since we were here, you know, staring into each other's eyes and all, telling each other irrelevant pieces of little lies and pretending that we believe it all. Actually it's more of me telling you stories (which I am sure you doubt) and you staring into my fingers (not my eyes) through your device's screen and hoping on your life that you will get something interesting on this trainwreck that you can actually use. Anyway enough of that emotional, heart-wrenching, tear-invoking, blood-chilling, depression-causing introduction and let's get BUSY! (*disturbing and utterly inappropriate wink) I WAS ROBBED! Yes, I am that blunt! No,it wasn't one of those sappy 'Cupid robbed my heart' robbed and neither was it one of those, disturbed 'My heart was robbed of all emotion' robbed (which, by the way, comes with a jug of poison and a sack full of powersaws all delivere

HELLO! *Adelle voice* Life is a struggle, am I right or am I right? But, before I get into my ungrateful state of affairs, how are you? The cold in this here Nairobi, this July, *sigh* and do you know what's worse? Some times the cold feels like letting up and there comes the intense sun! By intense sun, I honestly do mean I-N-T-E-N-S-E, okay that's a bit of an exaggeration but, you get what I am driving at, right? Of course you do. Well I have a bit of a personal experience, so, there I was recently, all wrapped up in my almost-expensive (yes, almost-expensive is an actual price) trench-coat and beenie and thick gloves, think thick as the broke-ness going on at this time of the month (mid-month represent *Fat-man Scoop voice*). Well, the morning went by well, 10 am,11 am,then out of nowhere, the 12.30 pm turns into a nice warm day-changer. "Just take off all your extra layers," you might be saying, but before you think I am slightly slow in thinking and reasonin

Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to witness yet another train wreck of this little thing we convince ourselves is a blog. So, where do I start? I know (glowing bulb over my head moment), let's take a trip down memory lane. I have been on a nostalgic tip for the past few days so why don't you find yourself a spot (I suggest extremely public or just awkwardly placed to be the centre of attention) and join me. First, a few years back, maybe one or two (before I realised that online shopping was actually a real thing, story for another day), the legendary SAUTI SOL dropped a song that had Amos and Josh on it and it was HUGE! Nerea was the song's title and man oh man did this song have us all on another level. There was one favourite line in this song that everyone loved, "Mungu akileta mtoto analeta na sahani yake." Now,of course those were the wrong lyrics to this song because the proper words are, "Mungu akileta mtoto analeta saa ni yake." The

Today I am not in the mood to say Hi to you so, I am going to be rude and get right into today's agenda. I feel like you and I are at that place in our relationship where you expect me to dish on all the little, nasty details... wait, grammar check, it's nasty, little details... so yes, I feel like you and I are at that point in our relationship where you expect me to give all the details pertaining my daily encounters with fellow human beings, an occasional mermaid and those aliens that seem to be popping up once every two weeks.(They are getting more comfortable in our polluted earth air I guess). Well, you are in luck boys and girls because have I got dish for you! So, if you are a Nairobi-person, you have the idea of the supremacy of MATATUS aka MATHREE or whatever else you like to baptise these beasts of burden and entertainment and convenience. We shall discuss these in depth or shallow depth or waist high depth or any sort of depth you find suitable; BEASTS OF BURDEN T

So I guess we are back at it again, you and I, huh? Oh well, LET'S DO THIS you little B**CUITS!!!!! Yes, I just had to pull that one on you. How have you been though? I feel like its been a few weeks since we were last here together,you know,me doing all the story telling and you trying to read through it all, trying not to show your utter boredom.(Sigh) Good times. I have had quite the writers' block I tell you, I mean I try writing something and then suddenly, I just want to take a nap, or go pet my goats ( yes, goats,not dogs or cats or mice, just g-o-a-t-s you should really try it. I hear goats are amazing for your skin,especially since they are enclosed in a pen and the only part of you that's in contact with them is your palm. P.S try not to touch your face afterwards.) So as I was saying before we rudely interrupted by the digressing thoughts,I didn't really know what to write, post and force you to read, because, let's all admit it,I am pret