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Showing posts from March, 2017

#BeardGang

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The month of March is coming to a close. What do you have to show for this first quarter of 2017? I for one have quite a number. I have a new kid (Okay, he was born in February, at least I have a goat, jeez, get off my back). I swear Valentino has me feeling like DJ Khaled and Asahd. Puss gave us a litter of kittens, I mean, it's raining young ones over here! And finally, I grew another beard strand. Now here is where I have an issue. Some of us have facial hair deficiency or maybe we just happen to be slow beard-growers. People ask me why I stopped going to the barber's,well, let me tell you how it all went down. A beautiful sunny morning, I woke up feeling all middle-class and entitled. Yawned, drew the curtains, sent a shoutout to The Big Man in The Clouds and went looking for food to stuff in this hole in my face. Nutrition gotten? Good. Maybe I showered or I didn't, anyway I hopped on out to the kinyozi. There's something about the barber shop that sets it apar

REST IN PERFUME

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Dearly Beloved, You know how the oldies said something like life is a vicious cycle or life is a circle or whatever it was that those human beings we are named after said. The Buddhists believe in reincarnation. Now don't throw rocks at me or anything, I mean, yoga and meditation and finding your inner 'chi' works for some people but I tend to draw the line at reincarnation. Here's how I see it, you get your, say 70 (give and take) years dealing with human beings and paying rent and buying food and trying to afford clothing,then, Our Good God decides it's time you take a kaSabatical ; time to get yourself a little R'n'R (for the record I have no idea what R'n'R means and I am NOT going to google it) and you decide apana, lemme go back as a dog, a donkey, a hyena hehe, a monitor lizard (those ones that look like they can beat you up proper and they don't even fear rocks being thrown at them *cue Foundation by Daddy Owen and Papa Dennis #GOSPEL